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I keep telling myself I’ll only play agario for a few minutes. Every. Single. Time. And every single time, the game drags me in like a whirlpool of colorful chaos, leaving me either laughing hysterically or cursing at my screen. Today was no exception. Let me walk you through the latest round of my blob-filled misadventures.

Starting Small, Dreaming Big

As usual, I spawned as the tiniest blob imaginable — practically microscopic. I floated around collecting pellets, enjoying the peace, and thinking, “Okay, today I’ll just play calmly.”
Ha! That lasted exactly 12 seconds.

The moment I drifted near a slightly bigger blob, my tiny brain thought: Opportunity! I moved toward it, feeling sneaky. But before I could even blink, a giant blob named “WifiDestroyer” swooped in and ate me like it was my destiny.

And just like that, my “peaceful” start was over.